I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
