batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
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