i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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