She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
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Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
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Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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