sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Randomize