Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
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