Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I love having hate sex.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
