Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize