bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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