in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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