Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
