I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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