remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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