I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
