Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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