It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?