her vagine was all disorganized.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!