i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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