Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
