he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize