She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
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You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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