I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i will never coherently bang her
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize