Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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