Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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