if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
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