She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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