yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
