Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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