just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
