physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
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You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
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Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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