I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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