I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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