K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
