i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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