Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize