Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
