just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
