The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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