My first STD was from a foam party
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
