I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
