How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
