she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
