That's when you crack a 10am beer
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
