is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Randomize
