I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
