he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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