Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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