Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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