i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
