I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
