i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
