I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
