Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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